as published in Conway Daily Sun
In our last column, we discussed getting ready for a new year with big new goals you will actually achieve. If you missed it, you can read it online at www.klineseminars.com/articles. Reaching for old goals we have tried before or procrastinated on in the past, may not be helpful. If every year you say I am going to lose 20 lbs. or clean out the basement or go back to school, maybe we should explore why we have set these goals in the past and not met them. Do not allow yourself to make any excuses; just answer the question as to why you did not achieve these goals in the past. Why did you procrastinate? Were the goals something you were passionate about? Were your goals accompanied by a powerful reason? Were your goals really just what you think you should do based on what other people expect of you? Our last column outlined them in much more detail, but we started with three basic steps. Step one is to know your life purpose. Step two is identifying your passions and set them in order of priority. Step three is visualizing the various aspects of your life and deciding what you want, without worrying about how you will get there. The seven areas I use are Career, Financial, Relationships, Health & Wellness, Personal, Renewal and Personal (the have/be/do/bucket list).
If we are setting goals that other people want us to accomplish, we will not be very inspired to make it happen, and then we beat ourselves up for failing. I would argue that you have had plenty of successes throughout your life, yet the failures weigh heavier on us. Let’s not set ourselves up for a failure we don’t even care about. Set goals based on your purpose, your passion, and your visions for yourself.
It can be daunting to set goals that you cannot see how you will accomplish. I hear that objection frequently – “I don’t see how I could ever do that” or “That doesn’t seem realistic”. If you only set goals you know you can accomplish, it is probably not much of an accomplishment. You could argue that a small step is better than no step, but I would argue back that a big step can be easier to accomplish. For instance, if Martin Luther King had a goal to lose weight, he would not have had millions of supporters. When Oprah sets a goal to lose weight, she has millions of supporters because they were already in her corner because of her bigger goal to use the power of TV to change the world. Your tribe will show up and support you when you create vision worth supporting. Support, inspiration, ideas and solutions show up when you show up with a strong passion for something. If I’m planning a road trip to Florida, I don’t set a goal to just get as far as my brother’s house in PA. That is the first step in the strategy; it is not the vision. If I put the destination in the GPS, I can trust I will get the directions as I go, I do not need to have all of the directions before I start. If I drive at night, I will only be able to see the short distance ahead, lit by my headlights. I trust the headlights will continue to light the way as I move forward, and I do not need to see very far down the road all at once.
Creating your vision is like programming your mental GPS. If you say “I will earn $1million by Dec 31, 2015”, you have a destination programmed. If you say “I will spend two weekends a month doing family activities with no work,” you have a destination programmed. If you add the common “but I don’t know how”, you de-program your unconscious GPS. When you create the vision, write and articulate the goal, create supporting positive affirmations, then make your plan and take some action, the magic will begin to happen. Your unconscious mind will start to make you aware of ideals and opportunities that you would otherwise not have noticed. It is like when you buy a new car, suddenly you see the same model everywhere. They were always there, but now they are in your conscious mind. The same is true of opportunities that will help you reach your goals, but you must know how to program the unconscious mind to do this work for you. It is easy to do, but difficult to trust if you are new to the concept. You may experience roadblocks such as being hung up on limiting beliefs or decisions you made years ago. Perhaps you’re stuck on past failures, fear of failure, fear of sounding foolish, fear of sounding too lofty, feeling unsupported by family, friends or co-workers. This is your life. No one else can live it. I have found that every time I step more into life, the more love and support shows up. Life’s GPS has never failed me. I trust it will not fail you.
You have about two weeks left before New Year’s Eve resolutions. When asked, please say “I do not do New Year’s resolutions; I am working on my life goals”! One goal that supports my passion work and life purpose is to host success workshops. I am making time to do one public workshop in NH this winter, on January 16th in N. Conway. Visit my website for details and book before Christmas to save yourself some money.